First Date Etiquette

Some guidelines for that first date.

This should kill some time while i wait at the DMV

10. Don't go straight to the bar. For obvious reasons. You're going to get drunk, dry hump on the dance floor and end up having intercourse. If you're a guy this could probably be awesome for you but since you don't know this girl you might end up with herpes. If you're a girl don't be a whore and give out because he will not call you the next day.

9. Don't pick somewhere expensive. You barely know this girl. Why blow money to impress her? Save it for another time if she's actually worth it.

8. Don't get into a conversation about your past relationships.
"Yeah, my ex she's fuckin crazy. She still blows up my phone, shows up to my work unannounced, and leaves me voice mails of her breathing and sobbing."

If this is the case, you should make a run for it. They probably just broke up yesterday.

7. Who is going to pay?
Personally, I think the guy should on the first date. But, girls should at least offer to. If he lets you, that should say a lot about him.

6. Make plans for the date at least 3 to 5 days in advance.
Girls: Don't agree to hang out with a guy if he asks you on the same day. Set a time for a different day. Let him suffer in anticipation for a little bit.

5. Use flattery, appropriately.
You should comment on how good she/he looks. She didn't spend half the day looking for a push up bra for her A cup tits for no reason.

4. Girls, don't dress like a slut.
He wants to go on a date because he already thought you were attractive. Don't come out of your house in 7 inch FMP's (fuck me pumps), a sleazy polyester dress, and your nipples hanging out. Have some class. This will probably send the wrong message.

3. Don't get tooo deep into your conversation. Sometimes girls get in a habit of talking too much about sensitive subjects in their life. If she starts talking about how she used to get beat by her father and gang raped, try changing the subject. Keep it simple. You're getting to know each other. This is not a therapy session.

2. Don't eat anything too messy or anything that could potentially make you gassy or bloated. You might want to stay away from anything dairy, mexican food, or Crab Hut. You don't want to hold in your fart for 2 hours right?

1. Brush your tongue!!!!!!!

We already know that you're going to brush your teeth, but some people forget to brush their tongue. If you could smell the other person's foul ass breath from a foot away that is just a turn off.

Some people seriously forget:
A. Brush your teeth in a circular motion for about 2 to 3 minutes.
B. Brush all the white stuff on your tongue till it turns pink
C. Floss please!!!!

If your breath still stinks. You probably have some sort of digestive problem. You might want to get a prescription for that. Bring some gum/mints/mouth wash. Whatever it takes.

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